My Destruction

Why do I have to look at this. Cant I just put it away in a cupboard. But I cant because something will come to cover it over and I have finished with creating coping devices.I want you gone from every pore of my skin.Because I cant see what I learnt from you. And I need to forgive you and I realy dont want to.

There is not a thing that I can do to get her love. She traps me in her put downs. She assasinates my personality. Such hatred goes inside your bones and in your head. I want you out! I feel you in me today in my face. My face is yours. I fight you, fight to please you. Did I tell you that she hit me. Im sure its not true. Im sure I made it up. Because she told me it wasnt true. Its a secret. Its a secret I dont remember. But Iremember the words you beat me with. The way you made me ugly. I dont know what I ever did but it was never what you wanted.You tried to infect me with your madness. But I am stronger than you think. Such an ugly paragraph that I stop.